What About The Groom?

Dear Diary,

        What about the Groom?

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Weddings aren’t designed for men, as Roy Blount, Jr. an American humorist writer, who has messed up a few himself, attests. They are completely for the benefit of women. If it were otherwise, we’d have to marry the same woman three, four, six times before getting it right. And we’d still probably never hear the end of it.

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What about the groom? Why are weddings centred solely around the bride? Why are they called ‘the most beautiful day in a woman’s life?’ What about thé groom? Isn’t he important too? In the Nigerian society, the woman fears, hopes and prays desperately for a man to come marry her and give her the ‘honour’ befitting a woman but on the day this union is to be solemnised, it becomes all about the bride.
Here’s a proposal: maybe women should just go ahead and have the wedding without us, and we’ll show up later at the reception.

Or
Wouldn’t it be quite fascinating to see an entire wedding planned and structured around the groom?
What would that be like?

The long-established sole function of the groom at an organised and well-attended wedding is just to stand there, smile and take strongly into consideration that this wedding is not about him. If he suggests his own interests in any way, he is prone to be remembered forever as the one who destroyed what should have been the most beautiful day of a woman’s life.

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Aren’t the lines between genders becoming more distorted and hazy? Today there are probably male strippers at bridal showers and more brides than before have at least one tattoo. So why do weddings have to be so exhaustingly feminine?

Why is there even a word ‘bridal’? Bridal shower, bridal train, bridal expo magazine etc. But there’s no such thing as a Groomal train. There is no such word, in fact, as Groomal.

What about the groom? Is he just plain uninterested, waiting for the bride’s day to come and be over with already? Is he scared? Doesn’t he feel left out? What does he want?

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7 thoughts on “What About The Groom?

  1. I think it’s because guys mostly don’t care. They don’t want to be involved in the stress that comes with planning the wedding. Most guys don’t even care. It’s just “do let’s leave this place. I think if the guys showed more interest, then there’d be more about them.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Methinks it’s some sort of compensation (in advance) to the bride cos from that day henceforth, it’s going to be all about the (now) husband and his whims- at least in our part of the world.

    Liked by 1 person

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